Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Randomize
