Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
