Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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