you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
