I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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