after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize