never play flip cup with pint glasses
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I want to fling myself into the sun
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
