It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize