I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
