Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Randomize
