but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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