I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Randomize
