I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize