This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize
