Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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