she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
