I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Randomize
