we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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