you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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