whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
After tacos, we're chasing women.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
