I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Is it because I queefed?
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
