What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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