Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize