He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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