Can i not drive my cunt home
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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