Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize