If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
