I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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