Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Randomize