we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
