He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
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