Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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