You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
