What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
