You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
So squirting runs in the family.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize