Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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