I don't think brook has ever known best
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
