The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize