Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
