well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
love makes seman taste better
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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