yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Randomize
