I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
