and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I don't deserve a penis
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
