she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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