I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
