what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
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