Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
