apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
