I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
