You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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