Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
